Rent Seeking: A Short List of Things Attributed to Global Warming

Source: YouTube

A short video cataloguing some of the more ridiculous things that have been attributed to global warming by the mainstream media.

Visit http://www.numberwatch.co.uk/warmlist… for a complete list of global warming absurdities:

A complete list of things caused by global warming

Apologies for a temporary delay in updating the dead link list

Acne, Afghan poppies destroyed, African holocaust, aged deaths, poppies more potent, Africa devastated, Africa in conflict, African aid threatenedaggressive weeds, Air France crash, air pockets, air pressure changesairport farewells virtual, airport malaria, Agulhas current, Alaskan towns slowly destroyed, Al Qaeda and Taliban Being Helped, allergy increase, allergy season longer, alligators in the Thames, Alps melting, Amazon a desert, American dream endamphibians breeding earlier (or not)anaphylactic reactions to bee stingsancient forests dramatically changed, animals head for the hills, animals shrinkAntarctic grass flourishes, Antarctic ice grows, Antarctic ice shrinks, Antarctic sea life at risk,   anxiety treatment, algal blooms, archaeological sites threatened, Arctic bogs melt, Arctic in bloom, Arctic ice free, Arctic ice melt faster, Arctic lakes disappearArctic tundra lost, Arctic warming (not), a rose by any other name smells of nothing, asteroid strike risk, asthma, Atlantic less salty, Atlantic more salty,   atmospheric circulation modified, attack of the killer jellyfish, avalanches reduced, avalanches increasedBaghdad snow, Bahrain under waterbananas grow, barbarisation, bats decline beer and bread prices to soar, beer betterbeer worse, beetle infestation, bet for $10,000, big melt faster, billion dollar research projects, billion homeless, billions face risk, billions of deathsbird loss accelerating, bird populations dying, bird strikes, bird visitors drop, birds confused, birds decline (Wales), birds driven north, birds face longer migrations, birds on long migrations threatenedbirds return early, birds shrink(Aus), birds shrink (USA), bittern boom ends, blackbirds stop singing, blackbirds threatened, Black Hawk downblizzards, blood contaminated, blue mussels return, borders redrawnbluetongue, brains shrink, bridge collapse (Minneapolis), Britain one big city, Britain SiberianBritain’s bananas, British monsoonbrothels struggle, brown Ireland, bubonic plagueBuddhist temple threatenedbuilding collapse, building season extension, bushfires,   butterflies move northbutterflies reeling, butterfly saved, carbon crimes, caribou decline, camel deathscancer deaths in England, cannibalismcaterpillar biomass shift, cave paintings threatenedchildhood insomnia, Cholera, circumcision in decline, cirrus disappearance, civil unrest, cloud increasecoast beauty spots lost, cockroach migration, cod go south, coffee threatened, coffee berry borer, coffee berry disease, cold climate creatures survivecold spells, cold spells (Australia), cold wave (India), cold weather (world), computer models, conferences, conflict, conflict with Russiaconsumers foot the bill, coral bleaching, coral fish suffer, coral reefs dying, coral reefs grow, coral reefs shrinkcoral reefs twilight cost of trillions, cougar attackscrabgrass menace cradle of civilisation threatened, creatures move uphill, crime increase, crocodile sex, crocodiles driven from water, crops devastated, crop failures increase, crumbling roads, buildings and sewage systems, cryptococcal disease, curriculum changecyclones (Australia),   damselflies forced back to UK, danger to kid’s healthDarfur, Dartford Warbler plaguedaylight increase, deadly virus outbreaks, death rate increase (US), deaths to reach 6 million, Dengue hemorrhagic fever, depression, desert advancedesert retreatdestruction of the environmentdig sites threatened,  disasters, diseases move north, diving reefs closed, dog diseasedozen deadly diseasesor not, drought,    ducks and geese decline, dust bowl in the corn beltearlier pollen seasonEarth axis tilt, Earth biodiversity crisis, Earth crumbling, Earth dying, Earth even hotter, Earth light dimming, Earth lopsided, Earth melting, Earth morbid fever, Earth on fast track, Earth past point of no return, Earth slowing downEarth spins faster, Earth to explode, earth upside downearthquakes, earthquakes redux, El Niño intensification, end of the world as we know it, erosion, emerging infections, encephalitis, English villages lost, equality threatened, Europe simultaneously baking and freezing,  eutrophication, expansion of university climate groups, extinctions (apes, human, civilisation, koalaslizards logic, Inuit, smallest butterfly, cod, penguins, pikas, polar bears,   possumswalrus,  tigerstoadsturtles, pandaspenguins, plants, ladybirds, rhinoceros, salmon, troutwild flowers, woodlicea million species, half of all animal and plant speciesmountain speciesnot polar bears, barrier reef, leaches, salamanders, tropical insects, flowers) experts muzzled, extreme changes to California, fading fall foliagefamine, farmers benefit, farmers go under, farm output boostfarming soil declinefashion disaster, fever, figurehead sacked, fir cone bonanza, fires fanned in Nepal, fish bigger, fish catches drop, fish downsize,   fish deaf, fish feminised, fish get lost, fish head north, fish shrinkingfish stocks at risk, fish stocks decline, five million illnesses, flesh eating disease, flies on Everestflood patterns change, floods, floods of beaches and cities, flood of migrants, flood preparation for crisis, flora dispersed, Florida economic decline, flowers in peril, flowers wilt, flying squirrels move up, fog increase in San Francisco, fog decrease in San Francisco, food poisoningfood prices rise, food prices soar, food production increasedfood security threat (SA)football team migration,   forest decline, forest expansion, foundations threatened, foundations increase grants, frog with extra heads, frosts, frostbite, frost damage increased,   fungi fruitful, fungi invasion, fungi rot the world, games change, Garden of Eden wilts, geese decline in Hampshire, genetic changes, genetic diversity decline, gene pools slashed, geysers imperiled, giant icebergs (Australia), giant icebergs (Arctic), giant oysters invade, giant pythons invade, giant squid migrate, gingerbread houses collapse, glacial earthquakes, glacial retreat, glacier grows (California), glaciers on Snowden, glacier wrapped, global coolingglowing cloudsgolf course to drown, golf Masters wrecked, grain output drop (China), grain output stagnating (India), grandstanding, grasslands wetter, gravity shiftGreat Barrier Reef 95% deadgreat tits cope, greening of the NorthGrey whales lose weight, Gulf Stream failure, habitat loss, haggis threatened, Hantavirus pulmonary syndrome,    harvest increase, harvest shrinkage, hay fever epidemic, health affected, health of children harmed, health risks, health risks (even more), heart deaths, heart disease, heart attacks and strokes (Australia), heat waves, hedgehogs bald, hibernation affected,   hibernation ends too soon, hibernation ends too latehomeless 50 million, hornets, human development faces unprecedented reversal, human fertility reduced, human health risk, human race oblivion, human rights violations, hurricaneshurricane reduction, hurricanes fewer, hurricanes more intense, hurricanes nothydropower problems, hyperthermia deaths, ice age, ice sheet growth, ice sheet shrinkage, icebergsicesheet tipping pointillness and death, inclement weather, India drowning, infrastructure failure (Canada)indigestion, industry threatened, infectious diseases,  inflation in China, insect explosion, insect invasion, insurance premium rises, Inuit displacement, Inuit poisoned, Inuit suing, invasion of alien worms, invasion of Antarctic aliensinvasion of Asian carp, invasion of cane toadsinvasion of caterpillarsinvasion of catsinvasion of crabgrass, invasion of herons, invasion of jellyfish, invasion of king crabs, invasion of lampreys, invasion of midges, invasion of pine beetles,  invasion of slugs island disappears, islands sinking, Italy robbed of pasta, itchier poison ivy, Japan’s cherry blossom threatenedjellyfish explosion, jets fall from skyKew Gardens taxed, kidney stones, killer cornflakes, killing us, kitten boom, koalas under threat, krill decline lake empties, lake shrinking and growing, landslides, landslides of ice at 140 mph, large trees decline, lawsuits increaselawsuit successful, lawyers’ income increased (surprise surprise!)lawyers want more, legionnaires’ surge lives lost, lives saved, Loch Ness monster dead, locust plagues suppressed, low oxygen zones threaten sea life, lush growth in rain forests,  Lyme diseaseMajor vegetation shiftsMalaria, malnutrition, mammoth dung melt, mammoth ivory bonanza, mango harvest fails, Maple production advanced, Maple syrup shortage, marmots fatter, marine diseases, marine food chain decimated, Meaching (end of the world), Meat eating to stop, Mediterranean rises, megacryometeors, Melanoma, Melanoma decline, mental health decline, mental illness, methane emissions from plants, methane burps, methane runaway, melting permafrost, Mexican climate migrant flood, Middle Kingdom convulses, migrationmigratory birds huge losses, microbes to decompose soil carbon more rapidly, milk production lost, minorities hit, monkeys at riskmonkeys on the move, Mont Blanc grows, monuments imperiled, moose dying, more bad air days,   more research neededmortality increased, mosquitoes adapting, mountain (Everest) shrinking,  mountaineers fears, mountains break up, mountains green and flowering,   mountains taller, mortality lower, murder rate increase,  musk ox decline, Myanmar cyclone, narwhals at risk, narwhals suffocate, National Parks damaged, National security implications, native wildlife overwhelmed, natural disasters  quadruple, neurological diseasesnew islands, next ice age, NFL threatened, Nile delta damaged, noctilucent clouds, no effect in IndiaNorthwest Passage opened, nuclear plants bloomoaks dyingoaks move northoblivion, ocean acidification, ocean acidification faster, ocean dead spots, ocean dead zones unleashed, ocean deserts expand, ocean salt extremes, ocean oxygen crisisocean waves speed upOlympic Games to end, opera house to be destroyed, outdoor hockey threatened,   oxygen depletion zones, oyster herpes, ozone repair slowed, ozone risepenguin chicks frozen, penguin chicks smaller, penguins in the dark, penguin populations devastated, penguins replaced by jellyfish, personal carbon rationingpest outbreaks, pests increasepets in danger, phenology shiftspines decline, pirate population decrease, pirates run rampant, plankton blooms,   plankton plummeting, plankton wiped out, plants lose protein, plants march northplants move uphill polar bears aggressivepolar bears cannibalistic, polar bears deaf, polar bears drowning,   polar tours scrappedpollination halved, porpoise astray, profits collapsepsychiatric illness,   puffin decline, pushes poor women into prostitution, rabid bats,  radars taken out, rail network threatenedrailroad tracks deformed, rainfall increase, rainforest destructionrape wave, refugeesreindeer endangered, reindeer larger, release of ancient frozen viruses, resorts disappear, rice production fall, rice threatened, rice yields crash, rift on Capitol Hill, rioting and nuclear war, river flow impacted, rivers raised, road accidents, roads wear out, robins rampant,   rocky peaks crack apart, roof of the world a desert, rooftop bars, Ross river diseaseruins ruined, Russia under pressure, salinity reduction, salinity increaseSalmonella, salmon stronger, sardine run unpredictable, satellites accelerate, school closures, sea level rise, sea level rise faster, sea snot, seals mating more, seismic activity, sewer bills rise, severe thunderstorms, sex change, sexual disfunction sexual promiscuity, shark attacks, sharks booming, sharks moving north, sheep change colour, sheep shrink, shop closures, short-nosed dogs endangeredshrimp sex problems, shrinking ponds, shrinking sheep shrinking shrine, Sidney Opera House wiped out, ski resorts threatened, slavery, slow death smaller brainssmog, snowfall decrease, snowfall increase, snowfall heavy snow thicker,  soaring food prices, societal collapse, soil change, songbirds change eating habits, sour grapes, soybean crop to drop, space junk increase, space problem, spectacular orchids, spiders getting bigger, spiders invade Scotlandsquid aggressive giants, squid larger, squid population explosion, squid tamed, squirrels reproduce earlierstarfish sperm eaten by parasites, stingray invasion, storm damage costs rise, storms wetterstratospheric cooling, street crime to increasesubsidence, suicide, swordfish in the Baltic, Tabasco tragedy, taxes, tectonic plate movement,   terrorists (India), thatched cottages at risk, threat to peace, ticks move northward (Sweden), tides rise, tigers eat people, tigers drown, tomatoes rot, tornado outbreak, tourism increase, toxic seaweedtrade barriers, trade winds weakened, traffic jamstransportation threatened, tree foliage increase (UK),   tree growth slowed, tree growth faster, trees grow too fast, trees in trouble, trees less colourfultrees more colourful, trees lush, trees on Antarctica, treelines change, tropics expansion, tropopause raised, truffle shortagetruffles down truffles increase, turtles crash, turtle feminised, turtles lay earlier, UFO sightings, UK coastal impact, UK Katrina,   Venice floodedvolcanic eruptionsvolcanoes awakened in Icelandwalrus pups orphanedwalrus stampedewalruses come ashore, wars over water, wars sparked, wars threaten billions, wasps, water bills double,   water shortage to increase vegetarianism, wave of natural disasters, waves bigger, weather out of its mind, weather patterns awry, weather patterns last longer, Western aid cancelled outWest Nile fever, whale beachings, whales lose weight, whales move northwhales wiped out, wheat yields crushed in Australiawild boars thrive, wildfireswind shift, wind reduced, winds stronger, winds weaker,  wine – Australian baked, wine – harm to Australian industry, wine industry damage (California) wine industry disaster (US) wine – more English, wine -  England too hot, wine -German boon, wine – no more French wine passé (Napa), wine – Scotland bestwine stronger, winters in Britain colder, winter in Britain dead, witchcraft executions, wolverine decline, wolves eat more moose, wolves eat less, women cheat on vacation, workers laid off, World at war, World War 4, World bankruptcy, World-famous places threatened, World in crisis, World in flames, Yellow fever, zebra mussel threat, zoonotic diseases.

and all on 0.006 deg C per year!

Advice of any omissions (with sources) or broken links is welcome at warmlist@numberwatch.co.uk

Note: All links were live at time of posting. Inevitably some will disappear, particularly from Yahoo News.

Thanks to correspondents for additional entries; especially, as always, Our Man in Puerto Rico. Also, thanks to “Scraperguy” for the script to form the following:

The dead link collection

Africa hit hardest, African summer frost, agricultural land increase, Alaska reshaped, allergies increase, anxietyArctic tundra to burnatmospheric defiance, bananas destroyedbeer shortage, bird distributions change, blizzards, boredom, brain eating amoebae, business opportunities, business risksBritish gardens change, budget increases, cardiac arrestcataractschallenges and opportunitiescloud strippingcremation to end, damages equivalent to $200 billiondermatitisdesert life threatened, diarrhoea, disappearance of coastal cities, Dolomites collapse, drought in distant regions, drowning people, early marriages, early spring, Earth spinning out of control, Earth wobbling, evolution accelerating, extinctions (bats,    pigmy possums, koalas, turtles, orang-utanelephants, tigers, gorillas, whales, frogs,) faintingfish catches rise flames stoked, footpath erosion, glacial growth, global dimming, god melts, Gore omnipresence, Great Lakes dropharmful algae, hazardous waste sites breached, high court debates, HIV epidemic, human health improvement, ice shelf collapse, jet stream drifts north, lake and stream productivity decline, lightning related insurance claims, little response in the atmosphere, Lyme diseasemarine dead zoneMaple production advancedmental illness (Alberta), migration difficult (birds), mountains melting, mudslides, oceans noisieroyster diseases, ozone loss, Pacific dead zone, plankton destabilised, plankton loss, plant viruses,   polar bears starvepsychosocial disturbancespopcorn rise, rainfall reduction,   riches, rivers dry up, rockfalls,   skin cancer, smelt down, snowfall reduction, stick insects, stormwater drains stressed, teenage drinking, terrorism, tree beetle attacks, trees could return to Antarctic, tree growth increased, tsunamis, tundra plant life boost, uprooted – 6 million, Vampire moths, violin decline, walrus displaced, war, war between US and Canada, water scarcity (20% of increase), water stress, water supply unreliabilityweeds,   white Christmas dream ends.

Suggestions for replacement links are welcome.

Total (dead and alive) 826

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